


The Anatomy of Shrimp

by basilq



Category: Peppa Pig (Cartoon)
Genre: Bullying, Crack, Earthquakes, Fat Shaming, Gen, Ireland, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Racism, References to Drugs, islamaphobia (sorta not really)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:06:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29415336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basilq/pseuds/basilq
Summary: peppa pig and pals do things 😳
Kudos: 1





	1. Introduction/Preface

**Author's Note:**

> WArning!!! Viwer excretion advized!!!

The evolution of literature as a medium is, without a doubt, one of humanity’s greatest achievements in that it quite firmly establishes the existence and cultural aspects of the civilization and time frame that any particular piece of literature coexists with. Whether one reads to appreciate the carefully crafted diction of a poem or uncover the deep and complex psychologies within the characters of any masterfully written novel, it is undeniable that without ample application of deodorant, the sweat-drenched underarms of any person will never cease to reek of the smell one so desperately wants to rid themselves of, the same way my parents try everything in their power to rid themselves of me.

(btw im not a furry for writing a peppa pig fanfic XD dont judge uwu owo)

HETEROSEXUALITY SUXXXXXX


	2. The Beginnings of a Legend

It was a bright, stormy day in the quaint town of Urmomgae, England. Peppa and George were feeling hungry from jumping up and down in muddy puddles, so they decided to go inside to eat some fresh, store bought chocolate cake. 

However, they soon found their stomachs filled not with scrumptious chocolate cake, but with a sense of frustration, as all they could find in their kitchen were bananas and Nesquik strawberry milk. “Peppa, why does this milk look like us?” said George, who could suddenly talk in coherent sentences. “Are we related to the milk since we’re like the same colour?” he wondered aloud, as he slowly verged on an identity crisis.

“Silly George!” huffed Peppa irritably. “Not  _ every _ thing that’s pink is related to us; it’s like saying all Asians are related! That’s just racist!” she exclaimed as she went in to have a mini asthma attack.

George looked at his sister and began to cackle, only to stop moments later, overcome by a furious coughing fit.

Karma is a bitch.

It was then that Daddy Pig entered the house, after struggling for hours to climb the hill atop which it sat, only to be greeted by his diseased children. He had woken up uncharacteristically that morning, claiming that his attendance was required at the semi-annual neighborhood Butter Conference.

To this day, scholars are unable to discern the exact veritability of that particular claim. It would remain a fact forever classified unknown among the annals of history.

“WHAT UP MU$$$LIMZ!” boomed Daddy Pig to his seemingly recovered offspring. They jumped, surprised by their father’s shriek.

“I really do feel like a Muslim during Ramadan, Daddy,” sighed his young daughter, “me and George haven’t eaten and we’re really hungry!”

“No Peppa, it is improper to say ‘me and George’; the correct way of phrasing that is to say ‘George and I’,” corrected Daddy Pig in a condescending voice, drawing the ire of his spawn.

“Shut up Daddy! You look like Shrek had a morbidly obese child with a blow dryer, marinated in Nesquik Strawberry Milk!”

“What is it with you and strawberry milk! I thought I already told you that was racist!”

“God, can you stop bringing up the fact that Cars 2 made me gay?"

Mummy Pig, hearing the commotion, suddenly burst through the wall to settle the situation “Your sister is right George. Though you might not be pretty, you  _ are _ pretty racist."

" _ Ugh. _ You're such a  _ bitch _ ," muttered the insulted piglet.

The sound of a belt being unbuckled was heard.

"WHAT YOU SAY TO ME AFRICAN-AMERICAN?!!"

"H-huh? I s-said 'I have an itch'."

"THAT BETTER BE WHAT YOU SAID!"

_ Fuck you and your Kool-Aid Man ass, BITCH _


End file.
